Still Growing

     It's comforting to know that I'm a work in progress, but so is every other teacher.  No matter how much experience we have, we have to continue to evolve with our students, our communities, our resources.  We're never done with the process of becoming great teachers. 

     That said, I've certainly learned a lot this quarter in both my college classes and in my elementary main placement.  I take in all I can from my mentors, my classmates, my textbooks, my administrators, and my students.  I mix it all up with everything I already knew (or thought I knew) and the result is likely to be some new way of thinking about something or doing something.

     I've come to see the tedious writing of lesson plans to be a good way to find flaws in my plan.  While I certainly don't stand in front of the class and read from a script, I've written one because it helps me develop the flow and pace of my lesson.  I have found the result to be the development of a natural clock inside my head that keeps lessons within time limits and keeps kids engaged. 

    Thinking about modifications to fit student needs is also laying out a framework of having lessons designed to meet a range of abilities yet still cover the required content.  My future students will have varied reading levels, understandings of math concepts, language skills, social skills, family units, physical abilities and attention spans.  I have to be prepared with something for everyone.  Taking the time to chart out individual student needs across subject areas is a good way for me to help them reach their potential.

     There's nothing like the real thing when it comes to experience.  These past months have put me in front of 27 students, their eyes fixed on me, waiting for me to say something profound.  My mouth absolutely goes dry. I've seen the looks on their faces that say "She doesn't know what she's talking about" and I never want to see that look again.  I've also seen them engaged and eager to get to work and that's a much more pleasant experience for all of us.

     I know the chaos of getting in all the fine points of the day - pledge of allegiance, straight lines, sharpened pencils available, flipcharts ready, lunch count, permission forms, soothing hurt feelings, phone calls to parents, fielding interruptions, Just Right Books, homework distributed, planners filled in, and who rides which bus.  On top of it all, there are so many expectations to meet.  My students and I are together trying to please parents, principals, school boards, government agencies, and future employers.  My goal is to take the pressure off students to make everyone else proud and just make themselves proud.  

Myself as Teacher

  My first official observation is done and I feel one step closer to this goal!  My Field Instructor did an excellent job of calming my nerves as she let me know this was a learning experience and I was to have fun in the lesson, first and foremost.  This thinking allowed me to prepare a read aloud lesson that opened the door for kids to enjoy the beauty of the book while thinking about the meaning of the text.  I've been reading to my daughters their whole lives and I've always enjoyed the drama of reading aloud.  It's impossible for me to deliver a story in a flat way!  There must be voice!  There must be pause!  There must be emotion!  My FI commented on this aspect of my lesson - it was obvious to her that my students enjoyed the reading and were engaged fully in the lesson.  Yea!

  For the most part, I'm happy with how the lesson went but I do wish I had a video to watch so I could see what my students saw.  Was I clear?  Talking too fast?  Repetitive?  Making eye contact?  Like any movie star, I'm sure there would be moments when I would cringe at my delivery, but there's a lot of value in seeing one's self from the outside.  Sitting in front of 26 kids, fumbling with trying to read a page while showing an illustration and reading a cue card to remember what my point was can be nerve-wracking!  I had considered using the document camera to show the pictures but there would have been some fumbling there, too.  It's about experience.  My FI pointed out that my face was hidden at times by the large picture book (Just a Dream by Van Allsburg) and students were unable to see my expression.  One group of students saw more of the book than me due to their location on the rug at my feet.  My Cooperating Teacher moves around a lot as she reads - standing, walking, scooting around on her stool with wheels.  For this first lesson, I was most comfortable seated near the chart that contained my teaching point. 

  The teaching point I had was excellent, according to my FI.  The learning targets fit and the path I'd laid out was good.  So, why did I deviate?  In the middle of my lesson, crazy ideas were popping into my head and rather than holding them back, I started throwing them into the lesson.  Yes, the story had irony but that wasn't part of this lesson.  My FI pointed out that there will be opportunities in the future to say to my students, "Remember in Just a Dream when the smog-producing manufacturing plant was in the business of making medicine for sore and itchy eyes?"  I can't do it all in one lesson.  Note to self: Make a plan for driving home the point of the lesson and stick to it.

  This first observation and the feedback I received from my FI gave me a huge shot of confidence.  The skills I know I already have showed through and the skills I need to improve upon give me attainable goals to work toward.  The challenge of taking constructive feedback and applying it to my next lesson is helping me to zero in on teaching traits that I will need every day in my classroom.

Teaching Middle School

     Today I had the opportunity to teach a reading lesson to a room full of 6th graders.  It was evidence to me that no matter how well planned, rehearsed, edited and re-hashed, there is likely to be the need to change direction, shorten, re-think, and maybe even scrap the whole thing!  I worked really hard on this read aloud and was very confident going into it. 
     For some reason, BOTH of my watches had dead batteries this morning and I considered that to either be a bad omen or a sign that I needn't worry about the clock.  As it turned out, I needed to worry about the clock.  Though I'd read through the story several times, it seemed to get longer and longer as I read.  Fortunately, it was a story that gripped the students' attention and inspired them to raise their hands, but I was very short on the time that I had planned for an assignment for them to show what they'd learned.
     So now I'm editing.  I'm giving the same lesson again tomorrow but it will be better, cleaner, smoother, and . . . shorter.